Being ‘still’ and living in the present moment is something I’ve really struggled with throughout my recovery. Having struggled to manage urges to over exercise for a number of years, I used to, and sometimes still do, struggle to just relax.
I’m only now beginning to appreciate the importance of rest. I have learnt that it isn’t ‘lazy’ to slow down, nor is it ‘idle’ to have a chilled day, it does the world of good for your mental wellbeing.
You don’t need to justify having a break, just do it. And you don’t need to try to do and be ‘enough.’ You are already enough- you are 1000x enough, and you deserve everything that this wonderful world has to offer, including rest! You’ve got to ignore that voice in the back of your head telling you that you’re lazy, making you believe that your worth is based on the amount of exercise you complete. It’s just not true.
I know firsthand how difficult it is to ignore that voice, especially since we constantly get bombarded with messages informing us that to have a productive day we need to have a full timetable scheduled with activities to occupy our time. This is incorrect. The definition of ‘productive’ is ‘achieving a result.’ If you’re body is craving rest, and you give yourself permission to listen to your body and just rest, you have had a productive day.
Moving on from that point, it’s okay if the only thing you did today was get out of bed, and similarly, it’s also okay if you ran a half marathon this morning. It’s all about balance, and its about listening to your body. If it wants rest, let it rest. If it craves movement, get active. Everything is good in moderation.
So, next time you’re feeling guilty about the amount of exercise you’re doing, don’t be.
Next time you’re feeling guilty for sitting still, don’t be.
Don’t let your eating disorder leave you feeling guilt-ridden, go against the voices, and they will get quieter. And one day they will be gone, and you will have reclaimed your life back. You will be free.
Take care of yourselves,