Portfolio of Hope

Not quite there…
Almost,
but,
not quite.

Like a rollercoaster,
that is about to drop-
Me: Staring into the abyss,
It: Looking back up at me,
my fear
of the unknown
is
relentless.

Awaiting
what lies ahead,
is progress,
so,
why do I want to go back
to the safety,
and security
(misguided),
of my past?

Why do I/
how do I
feel at once both broken,
and healed?
Both empty,
and full?

Broken,
because of what you did to me.

Empty,
because of what you took from me.

I long for the freedom,
but,
I can’t bear
to let it go.

Alas,
I must let it go.

And so,
learning to live without you,
I’m healing myself now
(finally).

Yet still I find myself
questioning;
‘How can I be full
when you,
you that made up such a big part of me,
is gone?’,
and questioning;
‘How can I be healed,
when you broke me
in two?’

I don’t have all the answers,
but,
I do know one thing:
I will heal,
without you
as I;
reclaim all that you took from me.
(and then some),
and as I;
make myself full,
without you.

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